Week 30: in which a jazz singer turns Albert Square blue

Sleuth is a sideways glance at the city each week. It's the truth, but Sleuth's truth. Sometimes Sleuth even gets serious, but not often... @mcrsleuth


Clad enough yet?

Sleuth sees residents in Green Quarter have lost a tribunal and will be made to pay to reclad Cypress Place and Vallea Court which have both been found to contain the lethal ACM composite found in Grenfell Tower. Back of an envelope estimates put this at around ten grand each. As a further kick in the teeth it was ruled they will also have to foot the bill for their landlord, Pemberstone, to bring the case against them. Oh and residents also have to foot the bill for a 24-hour 'waking watch' to make sure that the building doesn't go up in flames while they sleep.

Let's just get this right: the government allowed it, the industry knew about it, the architect chose it, the developer (Lendlease) installed it, the council approved it, the realtor washed their hands of it, and the residents must pay for it?

A farce in every sense.

And guess which developer is in the running to win a £190m contract to redevelop Manchester Town Hall?

Cypress Place Manchester Green Quarter 2
Cypress Place

Hey, spook, I’ll scratch your back if...

Sleuth was taking guests around disused Mayfield Station. Among the people was Lee, who said he was a psychic medium, and his partner, Laura. Nice gentlefolk. On the platform levels Lee identified a man in a boiler suit who had died in 1968 and was a gentle ghost. In the gloom of the former depot Lee identified an angry spook. A couple of weeks later Lee and his partner returned on another tour. They wanted to ask the spirits if they wanted to be released.

Later that day Lee wrote to Sleuth. ‘The spirit on the platforms was happy to leave and is now back with his wife and children,’ he wrote. ‘However the spirit in the depot was unhappy at me for asking him if he wanted to leave. Sometimes when a spirit is unhappy with something it can leave marks on you. I’m home now and Laura has noticed scratch marks on my back. This is not the first time this has happened to me but it all adds to the evidence.’ Lee then sent this picture as proof. It's a curious old world indeed.

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Ooh you kinky ghost

Love Island taco

Sleuth is gutted to have missed this press call at Deansgate's new Taco Bell on Friday night, which saw 'dumped' Love Island contestant Hayley Hughes 'enjoying her favourite Taco Bell treats with fans', watching the show alongside some 'lucky fanatics', and taking part in a live Q&A about the rise of Communism within the Labour party, the horrors of Stalinism and what it can teach us about the current preferred economic model. Hold on, no, Sleuth got his press releases mixed up there, the Q&A with Hughes was about which Love Island couple would make the tastiest taco. The answer: who gives a shit?

Hayley Hughes Love Island
"They're... out... of... tacos"

Don’t ask me how I am just look at my barometer

Sleuth was in Altrincham’s Mort Subite bar chatting to the owner Wyn Rhys. Mort Subite is a cracking Belgian bar in a basement that was previously a morgue for a nearby hospital. Wyn Rhys with Le Trappiste in Altie many moons ago pioneered the Belgian bar in Britain. 

“I got inspiration from a trip to Belgium where there was a place run by a man who had a mood barometer with pictures behind the bar which ran from him laughing and smiling to him being red-faced and angry. He’d place a marker on it to show what his feelings were at any given moment and woe betide you if you got on his wrong side when it was a 'red day'. He didn’t care about customer service at all on those days.” 

Sleuth likes this idea and thinks it should be universally adopted so we all would know where we stand with each other.

Mort Subite Bar
Caught in Mort

The Jazz Festival turns Albert Square Blue

Sleuth was enjoying the sun in the Jazz Festival in Albert Square around 1.30pm on Wednesday. He was with his elderly cousin twice removed who’s in her eighties but still has a glint in her eye. There was an act on the outdoor stage called Garde Dog. After one song finished a young woman came on the mic and said, “This song contains swearing and if you’re offended then, well, I don’t care.” The music started and she started shouting into the mic until it got to the sort of chorus which seemed to consist of “So I say fuck off, go fuck yourself, fuck off, yeah fuck off.” It seemed a bit much for lunchtime in a public square. “How catchy,” said the elderly cousin with a wink.

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Albert Square turned blue

Name games of Manchester

Sleuth was on BBC Radio Manchester being interviewed about the recently released tourist figures. He was being interviewed by a lady called Chelsea Norris. Sleuth idly wondered in the pub later whether any place names in our region had ever been deemed appropriate for use as a moniker. Didsbury didn’t seem right, nor Hulme, certainly not Weaste. 

“What about Gorton?” suggested a friend. “Boy or girl?” asked Sleuth. “Could be either,” shrugged his friend before adding. “Your presenter’s got a local one sorted anyway, her parents could have called her Heaton”. “Ah yes,” said Sleuth, “Heaton Norris.” In the next pub they met Miles Platting, who was with his new girlfriend Bess O’th’ Barn. She still had straw stuck to her.

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Chelsea, Chelsea Norris

Bee on a bike...

Here's the Heaton Park bee of the 101 giant bees that have landed in Manchester. It's called Miss BEATon by RP Roberts with the assistance of students and celebrates the park's community garden. And then someone put a bike next to it and look it's now Miss BEATon a bike.

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Miss BEATon a bike